This was originally the blog of a first-time Mum to remember the ups and downs of my pregnancy - and chart the first year of my daughter's life. But I've kept it going, and am now a mother of two! More than anything, it helps me to get to sleep once I've emptied my brain of issues and concerns and emotions onto the laptop.
If you're reading this and also a mum- or dad-to-be, first time parent, or just someone who's thinking about it - I hope it gives a little insight into one person's experiences - good and bad....

Friday, 15 April 2011


I've had a couple of really quiet days movement-wise which has really freaked me out. Got quite wound up yesterday, but as soon as I got home to DP (who'd been abroad for a few days with work), the Little Monster seemed to spring into action. Perhaps he/she was just missing Daddy's voice! Anyway - today's been a bit more active, and I have read that as there's less room in there I'm likely to feel fewer kicks. I just find it so un-nerving.

I've read articles, blogs and forums on a number of different websites, but I've found the Pampers one especially good for what to expect week to week, tips etc. A lot of the 'chat' on the likes of Mumsnet and iVillage can make me paranoid and worry about things for no reason. As every pregnancy and baby is totally different, it's not healthy to read so many scary stories, so I'm trying not to do it so much. Although it is nice to read the heart-warming stories of which there are lots, and find people with the same concerns/experiences as you.

Before the last few days we'd had a couple of really productive weeks. My 30 week ante-natal check-up and first Anti-D injection went really well. Had the best experience we've had so far at the hospital - no lengthy waiting time, really friendly and helpful midwife (third different one, mind), and everything seems well on track. The sun was shining, and I even got a rare parking space right outside work - it was a good day!!

The next day was my 34th birthday - and as a present I got a 'nipple-ectomy'! I may have mentioned before about a skin flap on my left nipple that has grown since my breasts have got bigger during my pregnancy. I was already concerned how that would affect my attempt at breastfeeding, but in the couple of days before my appointment at the breast clinic it started bleeding and looking a bit grim. Anyway - after a thorough examination of both breasts, the doctor simply sliced it off there and then, which is exactly what I was hoping for. Two days later when the dressing came off, I couldn't even see where it had once been - incredible!

One of my best presents - from DP - was a picture we'd seen in a little cafe when we were on our holiday in Scotland back in February. We both thought it would be perfect for the nursery,  though at the time we weren't really planning on a 'proper' nursery, and we were still holding back on buying stuff for the Little Monkey. But several weeks on I had thought it would have been really nice - a momento of a special holiday and unique original piece of art for the nursery. So he'd rung up and bought 'Fergus McTed and wee Scotty' from the cafe:

Had a lovely birthday weekend - a good Friday night out with friends, and then on the Saturday the grandparents-to-be (my parents) came up. As if their very generous birthday presents weren't enough - we then blitzed Mothercare. Although DP and me already knew precisely what we wanted - having made several fact-finding and window shopping expeditions - it still felt rather stressful. At one point, we had two shop assistants 'suggesting' what was best, but frankly confusing me even further, and I just had to walk away. Even had a few hormonal tears.

But once we put our collective foot down as to what we wanted, and just dealt with one sales manager, we managed to make quite a lot of headway. We've stuck all the big stuff (nursery furniture, travel system, car seat and base) on their BabyPlan - most of which has very kindly been paid for by both sets of GPs-to-be. We may be borrowing a car seat from my best friend, so that might come off the order. The furniture and pram aren't being delivered until the middle of May, but we did take a moses basket, rocking MB stand and stacks of bedding home with us.
So bit by bit we're starting to get there with the nursery and essentials. Still lots of odds and sods (bottles and steriliser, clothes, muslins, bath etc) to get - but I'll need to do some shopping on my maternity leave!

My Mum and Dad were very helpful and generous - and still really, really excited - but I still sometimes feel that over-excitement a bit overwhelming and have to step back from it for a bit. I guess there's a little part of me still worried things can go wrong, and I could end up disappointing a lot of people. I know that's not the most rational of thoughts, and I am excited - but just more privately, inside myself and find it difficult to share fully with anyone other than DP.

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